There are two aspects to finishing well—finishing well in life and finishing well in your current role/position. In this article I want to discuss finishing your current position well.

A sad fact is that many people do not finish well. Why does this matter? There are two major issues, the first is integrity, the second is that people will generally remember how you left a role more vividly than they remember any contributions you have made along the way.

So, to the first issue. Finishing well is a matter of integrity. This is true regardless of the reasons you leave somewhere. It doesn’t matter if you have been fired or if you’ve chosen to leave yourself, you still choose the manner in which you finish up. You can choose whether you continue to connect with the role and responsibilities right up until the end of your last day, or whether you turn up but in every way but one you have already left. You may be there physically, but emotionally, mentally, relationally you are not present. This leads to disconnected relationships, poor work, even negative actions. At its core this is dishonest. If you are being paid to do a role, then do it to the best of your ability—that’s having integrity. Turning up and collecting a wage but not putting in your best effort is akin to fraud.

Second, no matter how beneficial your contribution, if you finish poorly you will leave a poor impression in people’s minds. If you’ve had good relationships with your colleagues all along but because of your hurt feelings you offend those same colleagues as you leave, then they will remember those offences much more than the myriad of good times beforehand. Similarly, if you’ve contributed well all along, but when you finish things are incomplete, then again they’ll remember that when you left you made things worse, rather than leaving them in a good place to go forward.

No, it’s not easy. If it was we wouldn’t have to raise the issue at all. It is simple, though. All it takes is a commitment to be there until the end. This requires the ability to manage your own emotions as well as your actions—it requires being emotionally intelligent. At the end of any role where you have put something of yourself into it you will suffer grief. Expect it. However, don’t let your feelings control your actions and thoughts, control your thoughts and feelings—it’s one of the basic emotional intelligence skills. If you don’t know how get training.

One strategy is to plan how you will leave before you have to. Some people recommend planning your exit soon after you’ve begun in a role. Why? Because you won’t be as emotionally conflicted at that time as you will be when you are in the midst of leaving. This means you’ll be able to consider strategies with a clear head. Sometime the best plans don’t happen, circumstances change. That’s when having wise people who can support and coach you through are essential. Talk to your mentor/coach (you have one of course) and seek their wisdom on how to finish well. Sometimes it’s as simple as avoiding those things which will cause strong emotional reactions. Frequently you need to review your responsibilities and put yourself in your replacement’s shoes so you can leave tasks in a place where they’ll be easier to pick up.

If you have to leave and it’s not your choice, it’s much harder. The temptation it to just “tell them where to go”, either in truth or by your poor work or poor relationships. However in the long run all you do is damage your own reputation and act without integrity.

Decide in advance to finish well. Plan in advance to finish well. Then you can move on with your head held high, knowing that you have no regrets about how you left.